The story below….was written by me in February of 2010….I saved it on my desktop….and titled it WORTH IT. I really do not remember what prompted me to write it and then save it…because I never really had a plan for what I typed and saved on my desktop….but for some reason I did….and tonight as I was singing songs to Andrew, Katie and Gregory at bedtime….I remembered that I wrote what is written below… and that I saved it.
So during this holiday season when there is so much to be thankful for…most especially family….and the little things our little ones do to bring a smile to our face….I wanted to post this as a reminder about the joys of being a parent…..and remembering that every moment of parenthood is not joyful. My father once told me that being a parent is the worst thing and the best thing that ever happened to him…it is true….and as a parent now…I understand what he meant by that statement. However, back in February of 2010….I was reminded that it is all….
Every night I sing five songs to my seven-year old daughter, Katie. Songs I learned in a music class I took when my oldest Zach (now almost 13) was only about 18 months old. We attended, music-together, for about 2 ½ years. And I still remember and sing the songs. Katie loves them so much and really can’t get to sleep unless I sing to her and rub her sweet little back. If I somehow ever have forgotten, and she happens to fall asleep in her bed, I will hear her calling for Mama until I come running in. How sweet it is to hear her voice calling me Mama. Never Mommy or Mom, always Mama. And just the way she says it, it is so loving and needing of me.
Well on this one particular night, as I was singing to her, my Andrew ran in her room and put something on my back, and then so quickly ran out. I could not imagine what he put on my back. He’s a silly little guy-my Andrew the bulldozer. We call him that as he entered the world in about 58 minutes, no epidural, and his little face covered with bruises. Such a fast and furious entry into the world reminded me of a bulldozer. And funny, because from the time he was about one to three years of age he watched anything and everything about bulldozers. If we saw one on the side of the road-and it was sitting idle, he would just say-it’s not working and get really sad that he could not see it move, lift dirt or carry something quite large. Well, Andrew, my little bull-dozer’s note simply read: Can you sing me a song? It melted my heart to think of him finding that tiny piece of paper. And how he probably rushed to write it so he could get it on my back before I finished singing to Katie. He plays big boy stuff with his older brother Zach, but he is still my baby.
Tonight reminded me that it’s worth-it. February 23, 2010